Grief and Thanksgiving

At this holiday season, I am reminded of both the bad and the good things attached to the holidays for someone dealing with grief, whether over a recent loss or one more distant in time. The “bad” things are holiday “triggers” that provide unwanted reminders of the better times past. In my book, “Transforming the Valley of Grief,” I use the metaphor of “flash floods” for such times, when things are going well and then, all of a sudden some reminder of the departed loved one takes place, possibly at some important anniversary or on a holiday, such as Thanksgiving or Christmas, and we are once again swept away by the tides of grief.

But the “bad” things can be “good” ones as well. I am reminded that Job worshiped God upon hearing of the loss of his children:
Job 1:20-21 (ESV)
Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head and fell on the ground and worshiped. [21] And he said, "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord."
I am also reminded of the following passage from Joel:
Joel 2:13-14 (ESV)
Return to the Lord, your God,
for he is gracious and merciful,
slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love;
and he relents over disaster.
[14] Who knows whether he will not turn and relent,
and leave a blessing behind him,
a grain offering and a drink offering
for the Lord your God?
In the early stages of my “valley of the shadow of death” experience, I found this passage VERY encouraging—that God would “relent over disaster.” More importantly, it taught me to look for “left behind blessings” in the death of my wife to cancer. And what are we to do with those left behind blessings? We are to worship! That’s what the “grain offering and drink offering” are for—“for the Lord your God.” So at this time of grief in your own life, I encourage you to be thankful for your “left behind blessings” and to worship the Lord, who is gracious and merciful…and relents over disaster (even your own disaster!). I wish for you a thankful holiday season!